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According to Wikipedia, a paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect, and sometimes provides an anticlimax.
Take a look at some of these and you can see what I mean….
– Change is inevitable except from a vending machine.
– A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.
– You are never too old to learn something stupid.
– Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
– I used to be indecisive and now I’m not sure.
– Hospitality is making your guests feel like they’re at home even if you wish they were.
– The voices in my head may not be real; but, the have some good ideas!
– Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says “if an emergency, notify:” I put DOCTOR.”
– Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.
– You don’t need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
– I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
– Why does someone believe you when you say there are 4 billion stars but check when you say the paint is wet?
– Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.
– To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
“Once upon a time, there were four little girls, who had enough to eat and drink and wear, a good many comforts and pleasures, kind friends and parents…. and yet they were not contented…. these girls…. made many excellent resolutions; but they… were constantly saying, “If we only had this,” or “If we could only do that”….So they asked an old woman what spell they could use to make them happy, and she said,, “When you feel discontented, think over your blessings, and be grateful.”
“They decided to try her advice, and soon were surprised to see how well off they were. One discovered that money couldn’t keep shame and sorrow out of rich people’s houses, another that she was a great deal happier with her youth. health, and good spirits than a certain fretful, feeble old lady, who couldn’t enjoy her comforts; a third that, disagreeable as it was to help get dinner, it was harder still to have to go begging for it; and the fourth, that even carnelian rings were not so valuable as good behavior. So they agreed to stop complaining to enjoy the blessings already possessed.”
Written in the Book – Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
True happiness is indeed something that comes from within and does not relate to what we have or don’t have. It relates to what we make of the day and the time we are given. I have found in my own life that I am happier when I choose to make the lives of others happier. Everything we have on this earth is a gift from GOD. The very breath we breathe is a gift.
This past weekend I was able to see my little grand baby on an ultra sound monitor at only 16 weeks old. The little baby is 4 1/2 inches long now and weighs in at a whopping 5 ounces. Yet, as small as our baby is – I saw tiny legs, arms, fingers, and toes moving around and legs kicking like a wild one already. Yes GOD breathes the very breath of life into each of us and what a precious gift a new life is. I am thankful, and happy I have lived long enough after my widow maker heart attack to be able to see my little grand baby before even coming out of the womb.
When I was youngster growing up on the south side of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma we didn’t have much in the way of material things. My brother and I got school clothes once a year which consisted of 2 pairs of jeans, 2 shirts and 4 or 5 pairs of socks. That was supposed to last us the whole year. If we got holes in our jeans, Dad ironed on a patch or two to get us through until the next year. There were many days we went without lunch and breakfast simply because we didn’t have enough money to make it to the end of the week. I can remember being so hungry sometimes that I even thought about eating the crab grass in our front yard. Dad had an old Chevy that he paid $50 for that hardly ever ran. Not having much though didn’t seem to bother us. We were content with playing baseball, hide and seek, freeze tag, and enjoying time with our friends. Even if our stomachs were growling at us begging for food as we sat our desks in school, we were still happy for what we did have.
Sometimes when we start feeling down about ourselves, about what we don’t have, or how our life is going, it is best to start thinking about what we do have and in how many ways we have been blessed. It might be time to look for ways we can be a blessing to others who cross our path. That’s the path where true happiness can be found. It won’t be found covered up with things, but is waiting for you to find it where it’s been all along.
Well it’s been a few weeks since the election of our 45th President of the United States, Donald Trump, and there are still those interested in pursuing a recount of votes – like Dr. Jill Stein of the Green Party.
While it is true that Hilary Clinton does now lead in the popular vote by 2,357,260 votes with the states of Wisconsin, Michigan, and Pennsylvania still busy recounting votes, Donald Trump is way ahead in the electoral college by a whopping 104 electoral votes.
We all know that the electoral college is the vote that really counts in electing the President as was set up by the Founding Fathers of America under article 2, section 1 of the United States Constitution. There are a total of 538 electors which are based upon the number of members of congress per state. The exception is the District of Columbia which has the number of electors of the smallest state which is currently 3. Two-hundred seventy electoral votes are needed to elect the President, or which Donald Trump has 306 already. Some argue that the electoral college is not a fair system and should be eradicated. My argument to that insane comment is that there would be no fair balance between the smaller states and larger states in voting for the President if it was abolished.
When I was going to elementary school, there is something we did every single day of school before we would start our day. We would stand up beside our desks, place our right hand over our hearts, face the United States flag of America positioned in the corner of the room, and boldly say these words.
“I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under GOD, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.”
Hilary Clinton has already conceded, and it looks as if she does not, and will never have enough electoral votes to win the election, in spite of her lead in the popular vote. Nothing will change the outcome of Donald J. Trump officially becoming our 45th President of the United States in January 2017.
No matter how much we protest in the streets or pout, or want to move to another country, nothing will change the outcome. Division gets us nowhere as a country. We as Americans need to unite behind our flag and President and move forward as a nation of one now. We have much to accomplish to make our country even better than it is now!
Sometime, when you’re feeling important!
Sometime, when your ego’s in bloom;
Sometime when you take it for granted
You’re the best qualified in the room;
Sometime when you feel that your going
Would leave a unfillable hole,
Just follow these simple instructions,
And see how it humbles your soul.
Take a bucket and fill it with water,
Put your hand in it, up to the wrist;
Pull it out, and the hole that’s remaining,
Is a measure of how you’ll be missed.
You may splash all you please when you enter,
You can stir up the water galore,
But stop, and you’ll find in a minute
That it looks quite the same as before.
The moral in this quaint example;
Is do just the best that you can;
And be proud of yourself, but remember
There’s no indispensable man.
Sometimes we may think that we are the best at what we do, but we should always remember to be humble, and that there is always going to be someone who comes along that may be better. I think that’s good advice to just do the best we can and let the cards fall where they land. Doing your best is all you can do, and being too proud of oneself always has a downside in the end.
My wife Denise and I just found out we are going to be grandparents this summer. This has been the best Thanksgiving gift we could have ever received. GOD is great and we can’t wait to see the new little blessing that is on the way.
This is our first one on both sides of the family so I am sure the little one will get an avalanche of spoiling. I am not quite sure I can wait until summertime though! There are so many things running through my mind about what I want to tell, teach, and do with our new grand baby.
Whether it’s a girl, or whether it’s a boy it makes no difference to me. We are supposed to have some sort of a reveal party where that information, I guess is revealed? Something about blue or pink balloons popping out of a box. I know GOD has great things planned for this little one!
Someone asked me what I want to be called? I don’t know, but I have a few months to think about that one. I suppose I’ll be called whatever the grand baby ends up calling me. They say the grand babies end up calling the grand parents whatever the first one starts calling them. That’s what happened with our daughter too. Whatever happens, is fine with me.
We are looking forward to this new adventure in our lives. I am sure it will be a great ride!
“Step in as close as you can so that I can see you! Now you know I can’t really see you with that mask on. You’re going to have to take your mask off so that I can see who you really, really are.”
We all want others to love us and accept us for who we truly are yet we don’t live a life of transparency. The person we are on the inside is not the image we portray on the outside. Aren’t we all guilty of wearing masks to protect our true identity; to protect who we really are? We are afraid of being emotionally uncovered, and so we hide and crouch behind our masks that cover our deepest hurts and darkest thoughts that go rambling through our minds.
I suppose the mask has its proper place in our lives for a time. But I believe also that great day we learn to live without a mask is the day we really live for the very first time. It is in the removing of our masks that we find freedom. We become free and are liberated by learning to love and accept ourselves by honoring who we truly are.
Sometimes people act the way they do because of what is anchored deep behind the mask. We tend to look at the resulting action rather than what or who created the action.
I have received mercy, forgiveness, and kindness along my own life journey, none of which I deserved – but I am so very thankful. Showing love and compassion beyond the borders of the mask is how we can really make a difference in this world, for what we often see on the outside is only a reflection of the mask.
May we all learn in time to remove our masks and to be thankful for others who have extended to us forgiveness, mercy, kindness, and compassion.
This Thanksgiving may we all be able to work on removing our own masks, to truly see those who wear them, and of course to be thankful for others who have helped us to become better along the way.